Top 10 Things I Learned In My Years On Facebook or How Many “Friends” Can I Lose In One Post?

FYI: There were 3001 when I posted this. LOL

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“Live and learn.”

Conservatively, I estimate I “invested” 1400 hours of my life into Facebook over the past four years which is 500 hours more than it took to produce my book. Let that sink in a moment. I have dwelled on this for some time now. It is because of this significant amount of time that I did not just delete my Facebook account when the final straw arrived. I was close though. For better or worse, there is a legacy we leave behind on Facebook for our “friends”, if not the general public. However, if you posted as I did in a willy-nilly devil-may-care sort of way, you will spend days trying to clean it all up in order to leave a “best of” collection of posts worth scrolling before saying your final farewell. Be prepared for Facebook to “limit” your profile and page(s), a.k.a. putting you in Facebook jail, when you attempt such radical changes.

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1) Some people are not who they claim to be.

I am not talking about authors writing under pen names - which is absolutely necessary to avoid harassment - I am talking about people with multiple online personas. Don’t make the mistake of PROJECTING your level of integrity or values, a.k.a. honesty, discretion, and honour onto people you meet. It will bite you every time.

You can protect yourself by using a free deep web search at: pipl.com.

If aliases appear, search each one. If you know multiple locations where they have lived, search each city by each alias. It could take a while to compile all the data, and you should prepare yourself as the results can be nothing less than staggering. Look for, and even search, relatives, known associates, and phone numbers to confirm the site has not made an error. There are pay sites starting from $2.00 that generate a full report including criminal activities. You might want to consider one of these if you are in deep with someone you met online. May your god be kind with what you find.

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2) Don’t be naïve.

If you look up naïve in the dictionary, I’m sure you will see my picture there. I viewed joining the author communities on social media as an opportunity to connect with bright, engaging, open-minded seekers of wisdom . . . kindred spirits who would share thoughts as pen pals would, only using modern technology. Overall, nothing could be farther from the truth. Yes, you will encounter a few worthwhile decent types, but in a game where we count followers in the thousands, they represent a minuscule percentage.

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3) “Haste makes waste.”

I remember being excited about making “friends” on Facebook when I first started out. So excited in fact, I would send friend requests to anyone who had the words author or writer on their profile. Back then, the prevailing theory suggested the key to success was a numbers game; the one with the biggest following would get a publishing deal. People were actually buying followers 10,000 at a time. I didn’t buy into this. I viewed social media as a popularity contest which does not translate into book sales ─ the equivalent to putting flyers in your neighbor’s mailboxes. I have yet to see data which is convincing enough to see it any other way. If I knew better, I would have cultivated relationships with influencers, readers of my genre, publishers, publicists, agents, reviewers, and bloggers ─ all the people I did not have as “friends” but who might have made a difference to the success achieved by my book. Had I known then what I know now, my friends list would look very different than it does today.

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4) Cocaine would have been a better choice.

If you are going to choose an addiction, social media is the worst possible choice. THERE IS NO HIGH, and the more time you spend on social media the less happy you become. Anyone who has read my book, knows I am anti-escapist regardless of whether the high is produced naturally or artificially. Regular cocaine users know the drug has a diminishing return. The high is never as good as the first time they tried it unless they increase the quantity used; and the more they use, the more frequent their cravings become until it affects their lives. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no hypocrite. I let my demons out for an occasional stroll, but I pick my poisons carefully to ensure that none take charge of my life. Social media hooks us on being connected and never being alone. It is dangerous because humans must be alone in order to think, learn, and grow. Social media stagnates the mind and, Facebook at least, seems bent on depressing the populace. Endless distractions thwart creativity and productivity. If you: feel obligated to post on social media; look in regularly for comments on posts; have never turned off Messenger or notifications or your device, then you should pick different poisons for a while until you get a handle on the monkey on your back.

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5) I kept my promise.

I used my Facebook profile page as a playground where I could share multiple aspects of my personality. This allowed me a place to vent . . . and vent I did; or more correctly, am continuing to do here in what will become my last post to Facebook. Early on I promised the real me would be on display at all times to my “friends”. The people on my friends list did not get an artificial construct or watered down perfect illusion of who I am. Nope, they got the full Monte, or at least as much Monte as Facebook would allow. My inner bad boy posted what little nudity Facebook community standards would tolerate for two reasons: Firstly, I am a rebel who sees freedoms dying faster than the planet is losing species; and secondly, nothing in the world is more beautiful to me than the female form. I shared my sense of humour as well, even when I knew it might be crossing someone’s line every now and then. I also shared my philosophies, and those from others which resonated within me, in what I now see as a futile effort to awaken the sleeping oblivious sheeple. The proof is in the likes. There were next to none. Recently, I wanted to find out if I was out of Facebook jail so I posted: ‘Somebody, anybody, tell me if you can see me.’ This post got more attention than a year’s worth of meaningful posts, and at the same time, it made a sad statement on the superficiality of the average Facebook user.

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6) “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.”

As an author, I should have divided my time equally between Goodreads, twitter, and Facebook because Goodreads has proven itself to put your books in front of readers, and unlike Facebook, you can reach out to everyone and anyone on twitter. Time is the one thing you can never get more of and it does not allow do-overs. Spend yours wisely.

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7) Nazi hamsters! WTF?

Fuckerberg, and the Nazis in the shadows behind him, are using facebook for data collection on each and every one of us, as are most of the major corporations in Silicon Valley. The difference is Facebook knows far more about us than Google, and possibly even the makers of our devices and the companies that supply operating systems as long as they do not breach their published privacy policies which most have already been caught doing. Facebook considers EVERYTHING you share to be their property. This includes Messenger. Yup, your selfies and home-made porn videos are all sitting in a data farm somewhere and you can never truly delete them. They lured us away from My Space with the promise of something better. A promise which was never kept right from the beginning. Their endless adjustments to the algorithm, have severely limited our outreach to readers while they stayed busy categorizing and compartmentalizing us into something reminiscent of a box filled with hamsters where everyone is climbing all over each other. Good luck. I’m out.

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8) Let’s see Facebook for what it is: a societal manipulation site.

That doesn’t have the same innocuous ring to it as social media site, does it. In my time on Facebook, I have been appalled by posts in my News Feed ranging from animal cruelty to the shooting of an unarmed man by police, with a far too great number of others in between. Were they fake news as with the Trumpeter’s election campaigners who mysteriously showed up only to disappear shortly after the election? We can never know. What is clear however, is we are affected, influenced, and manipulated by what we see and hear in all forms of media. Worst of all, we become desensitized to atrocious human behavior and I believe this is NO ACCIDENT; but where they are intentionally herding the minds of the sheeple. When three billion users worldwide have been programmed to no longer give a shit about life, the world can easily fall into anarchy. On that day, the frightened sheeple will willingly turn over the last of their freedoms for safety. The single biggest difference between other forms of media and Facebook is there are no restrictions placed on what Facebook is allowed to broadcast. Facebook can do what they want with the get-out-of-jail-free-card of being a social media platform not responsible for the content created by users. There is no Editor In Chief to hold accountable for what is thrust before our eyes. Facebook’s new take on morality is not for me. It shouldn’t be for you either.

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9) Some people make it bearable.

If I look at my years on Facebook as I would my life, there are some parallels. I have a few regrets but there was also a great deal of laughter. There were a handful of people who made the time spent on Facebook almost seem worthwhile. I hope they keep in touch. There were also some standouts who stepped up when it really mattered, and they have my deepest gratitude.

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10) Facebook is what you make of it.

If you are just an individual who wants to keep tabs on people you already know in the real world, or if you want to find people you have lost touch with, then have at it while being VERY cautious of what you post or message to people. Keep your circle small and be wary of people you have not met in person when they send you a friend request. If you have the misfortune of being a writer who is following conventional wisdom, a.k.a. forced kicking and screaming into the social media spotlight as I was, then things will be tougher. Absorb and retain the previous 1800 words and I will leave you with the immortal words of my favorite Zen master: ‘Mind what you have learned; save you it can.’ – Yoda.

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Greatest Hits Volume 1: Thoughts for Thinkers & Seekers

Put a tweet in your kid’s lunchbox.

They tell me young people will only read memes or short posts of 500 words or less so I decided to give them a “best of” package of last year’s tweets. Please feel free to share any which stir something within you.
1x ignorence

4x phil

5x giving

6x books

7x humans

9x behaviour

10x insight

11x change

12x truths

14x dangers

15x lies

16x teaching

18x learning

19x truth

22x control

23x therapy

24x growth

25x role models

26x self

27x happiness

28x collective

29x readers

30x big brother

31x news

32x self

33x touch others

34x library bookstore

36x polarization

37x positivity

38x change edu

39x politics media

40x reading empathy

42x narcisists

43x happiness self

44x grounded

45x facts

46x internet influence

47x internet freedom

48x social media

49x obliviousness

51x change evil

52x active

53x political corr

54x edu

56x earth

57x open minds

58x happiness

59x knowledge expectations

61x self control

63x patterns

67x reading

68x awareness

71x knowledge happiness

72x self

I’m no Chad!

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Just as with the Trumpeter winning the US presidency, an attack in my hometown of Toronto required me to take some time to process my thoughts before I would weigh in on this latest example of extremism. Thankfully, there is no religious indoctrination associated with this incident which killed ten and injured thirteen. I have flogged that dead horse enough over the years anyway. No, this one is truly “new”, and would require some research on my part. By “new”, I mean a new take on a 5000 year old idea; men should rule and be the masters of all that is in their domain. What I found bothers me more than Trump and his bandits. So let’s take a look at the latest scourge reaped by our downward spiral in parenting and education.

misogyny – a hatred of women

How to make a misogynist:

  1. Uncaring; absent; ignorant; abusive; immoral; non-supportive parent(s).
  2. Early indoctrination into an organization or society where women are not equal to men.
  3. Early objectification of women through video games and pornography.
  4. Inadequate sex and relationship education.
  5. Unguided teen years.
  6. Exposure to the sex trade.

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In my book I toyed with misogyny while exploring my emotional damage from past relationships and coming to terms with how I feel about women, North American culture, and humanity as a whole. It started as a humorous idiot’s guide to manhood for my nephews, but it became something else . . . a complete instruction manual for life as a decent human. Sadly, I did not know how few men read such books when I wrote it. They are conditioned to appear as though they have it all figured out-causing most to actually believe they do. North American culture is of course an oxymoron as few of its citizens are cultured by definition.

cultured – having or showing good education, tastes, and manners

I will not give the perpetrator of the attack any mention other than to say it is doubtful he is sane. When something horrific happens close to home people want to know why and it is here where things become dark, murky, and disturbing. There are known to be approximately 40,000 others like him out there who share similar beliefs. They call themselves Incels.

Incel – a person who thinks of themself as being involuntarily celibate

When trying to imagine the membership of this group, one would naturally think of unfortunate individuals with deformities or who were disfigured in some way; thereby limiting their chances of attracting a romantic partner. However, this does not appear to be the case.

Misogyny + Entitlement + Dehumanization = Incel Extremist

The following excerpt is from an article by By Rebecca Jennings published on Racked.com which gives you a sense of what they are about.

Incels see women as either “Stacys,” who are hyperfeminine, attractive, and unattainable and who only date “Chads” (muscular, popular men who are presumed to sleep with lots of women), or “Beckys,” the “average” woman. Women in general are also referred to in dehumanizing terms such as “femoids” or “FHOs (Female Humanoid Organism).”

https://www.racked.com/2018/4/28/17290256/incel-chad-stacy-becky

Allegedly, these are nerds, geeks, dorks, dweebs etc. who have been publicly shamed and bullied to such an extent they are now stigmatized, leaving them socially awkward and incapable of engaging effectively with women they desire. They apparently use math to support their contention they only have a shot with the castoffs of the Chads. They think this is wrong and unfair.

I smell rationalization and I call BULLSHIT!

These morons have not earned the right to call themselves nerds.

pexels-photo-247899.jpegNerds, geeks, dorks, and dweebs are typically smart. Smart people know how to research to find a course of action which solves a problem. I have been called a nerd and a geek, mostly because I read and spend time in libraries, but it was time well spent. I did the work. I LEARNED. I understand women, human behavior, and our society which makes me very interesting to a Stacy who is tired of Chad’s shit. The more you learn, the more aware you become which leads to personal growth and change

These guys have LEARNED NOTHING!

They were ill-prepared for life. Sadly, they have formed an online group where they denigrate what they want the most-women. It is a support group gone wrong.

I object to them believing themselves to be nerds. A nerd is far more than a sci-fi enthusiast, gamer or comic book collector. These guys are pretenders; and just as their feeble minds did with women, they missed yet another point entirely.

Here is why an Incel can’t get laid:

THEY do not know how to stimulate a woman’s erogenous center.
THEY do not know where that is.
THEY do not care and are too lazy to find out.
THEY equate real women with their rubber porn star vagina sex toy.
THEY think women are just a collection of holes for their pleasure.
THEY do not respect women because they were never taught this.
THEY believe women won’t pick up on their misogynistic vibe.
THEY think they are superior to women.
THEY believe they should be entitled to any woman they wish.

I have news for you Mr. Rapey von Dick-Picker, it’s YOU not them.

Not getting sex is just nature’s way of saying you are not worthy and your genetic line stops here.

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I do pity them though. It’s not all their fault. Poor genetics, bad parenting, a low quality education, and unresolved emotional scars all combined to make them what they are.

At best, Incels are throwing the world’s biggest pity party and of course none of it is their fault. They are not happy with natural selection, nor are they willing to improve themselves in order to get in the game. Essentially, they are damaged and lazy with entitlement issues. In the worst cases, as with the Toronto incident, dangerous sociopaths are in their midst being primed for action.

Your Beliefs Create Your Reality. Part 7

CONTROL OF INFORMATION IS POWER!

I can’t believe I am saying this but…

I, E. A. Barker, do publicly acknowledge the following:

I agree with Donald Trump!

We need to take down the Internet.

I doubt he knew why this is a good idea, as he blathered away about anything which could get him in the news while he was campaigning for office, but he did say it.

Here are my reasons:

  1. We are seeing control of money via the Internet. A cashless future means you must be a good drone or else access to your money will be taken away with just a couple of keystrokes. Once the world becomes completely dependent on the Internet for banking and trading, anarchy can be created anywhere, at any time, by revoking access to it. This is how the Internet becomes a weapon.
  2. We are seeing control of information and the spread of disinformation that the average Internet user is ill-equipped to recognize. Global warming IS a clear and present danger to our civilization. Literally thousands in the scientific community have confirmed this, but their voices are being suppressed. To solve the problem, the West would have to move away from fossil fuel burning and its love of beef. This would threaten the PROFITS of oil companies, beef producers, and the automakers. In order to maintain the status quo, a seed of doubt had to be planted to keep the general public spinning. An agency found a couple of researchers who could either be bought or who had something to hide, and these patsies suddenly had a communications leak which stated they had been fudging global warming data. How convenient! Doubt was quickly spread over the Internet and the unpopular subject has gone away . . . but the countdown continues.
  3. We are seeing control of people. Aside from security agencies and hackers being able to watch you through your smart TV, social media is a spawning bed for anti-social behavior. People have distance and/or anonymity which allows them to spew anything that enters their puny brains without fear of ramifications. The on-line world is a safe harbor for gossips, sociopaths, and worse. Research has shown that following social media actually makes people less happy, but users become addicted. They are like kids who are told they have to go to bed. They think they might miss something juicy so they keep coming back. The Internet is creating a mass of socially retarded, anxious, and even depressed humans who cannot function in the real world. This works for The Givers of the Internet who do not want socially engaged upbeat people who might press for change.

What will it be like for children in the near future?

Technology is out-pacing our growth as a species in more ways than mere possession of atomic weapons.

The most powerful weapons control minds.

The incredibly dorky first generation users of Google Glass were quick to embrace the idea of being “plugged in” all day. This was man’s first step toward becoming a cyborg race. Sounds far-fetched, you say? Follow this News.com.AU link.

Education is embracing technology as a teaching tool which is being PROMOTED as a way to engage kids better. Funny, I thought a quality curriculum, well trained, well paid, and carefully selected teachers could engage kids, but I’m just some nut on the Internet.

Here is the writing on the wall:

  1. There is no PROFIT in producing better educators.
  2. A better curriculum would only produce youth with a heightened awareness, and they would be troublesome to the-powers-that-be―demanding change to the status quo.
  3.  Cutbacks in educational funding have intentionally created a perceived NEED for this technology, and I absolutely GUARANTY funding for Ed Tech will magically appear where there was none for teachers.
  4. MANDATORY “educational”chip implantation will happen or the child will be denied access to public education.

In a generation or so, children will have grown up being “plugged in” 24/7. They will be completely Internet addicted and completely helpless without it. They will learn more and faster but what we need to be asking ourselves is:

Who is supplying the curriculum?

The answer is: The Givers of the Internet.

Libraries are embracing technology for budgetary reasons as well. Paper books are expensive and there is only so much shelf space. Database access and e-books are cheaper and take up far less space. In theory, a tiny library in a small town could offer access to the entire library of congress, BUT this will not be the case  for two reasons:

  1. All those good books are not available in e-book form.
  2. The-powers-that-be will never let those books be part of a database which is intended to control information—not distribute it.

When education is fed directly into a human mind via artificial means, thought control is complete. The information that mind receives is completely in the control of another.

There will be no need to burn classic books, they will just not make it into the central database.

If you BELIEVE governments are working on behalf of the electorate, then it is time you woke up to THIS REALITY.

Your Beliefs Create Your Reality! Part 4

This is a very special unplanned segment.

For those who are not among my handful of followers, I am the author of the book Ms. Creant: The Wrong Doers! pictured above. At the beginning of 2017, I started this new blog series which explores how all of us are, at the very least, influenced by what we believe to be true or in the worst cases, completely handicapped by those beliefs. The message of this new awareness campaign is pretty simple:

We must question our beliefs or we fall victim to them.

This special segment is not about society or humanity as the others are. This one is about me. Unless you have read my book, you probably do not know much about me so I will give you some insights.

In 2007 I was injured in a workplace accident which, according to the various medical experts who evaluated me, has left me with a significant permanent physical impairment. Their collective prognoses did not paint a pretty picture of my future:

  • Daily pain worsening as years pass requiring ongoing ever-increasing prescription drug intake.
  • Limited ADL’s (activities of daily living)—worsening over time.
  • Eventual loss of mobility leading to other associated health problems.

There were more but you get the idea. I was faced at the time with what appeared to be only two choices:

ACCEPT or REJECT.

It appeared I would either have to BELIEVE and submit to THEIR FUTURE for me, or I could deny their findings and fight. I was never one to place any faith in authority figures and throughout much of my life I had always rebelled against them. For years I chose DENIAL and that did not work out so well as I endlessly suffered with re-injuries. These long recovery periods are where I began to write what I thought would be a short memoir to leave to my young nephews who were already repeating the mistakes of my younger days. The more stories I wrote, the more obvious my own repetitive behaviors became to me. I was creeping up to the edge of awareness or an awakening without knowing it. I would then spend a year researching a great many academic disciplines as I sought to unravel the mysteries of human behavior.  When I wrote The End for the first time years later,  I was already AWARE I had always had a third option where my CHOICES were concerned. I could have chosen to LEARN MORE. Since that time, every decision in my life has had three ways it could go:

ACCEPT, REJECT or RESEARCH.

Had I BELIEVED the medical experts, by now I would probably have:

  • become a prescription drug addict.
  • significant organ damage resulting from the continual drug use.
  • liver, kidney and heart problems which would of course be treated with still more prescriptions.
  • an inability to feel when I am at the threshold of overexertion so recurring injuries would have been far more frequent; thereby furthering my level of disability.
  • a brain chemistry so impaired that writing anything remotely cogent would be unlikely.

Fortunately in my youth, I somehow absorbed the importance of possessing the ability to learn; courtesy of the Canadian public education system.

Knowing how to learn is everything!

This brings us back to the present and closer to the special part I promised.

When I began my journey as an author, there were a huge number of things I could have BELIEVED which could have made me quit:

  • “Major publishers will not accept queries from first-time authors without agents.” This turned out to be true so I pitched the smaller ones.
  • “Publishers will not accept queries from non-fiction self-help authors lacking a PHD.” This turned out to be true but I had a problem with the idea that only PHD’s are capable of rational thought or original ideas. It is elitist and it does not explain why people with advanced  degrees have always sought me out when they needed a new perspective—so I pressed on.
  • “Agents will not take on new writers who do not have a substantial writing portfolio and author platform.” This turned out to be true so I began building one.
  • Publicists: “We are looking for a PHD as well, unless you are an entertainer.” I was unsure how those two equated so I moved on.
  • I amassed a large collection of rejection letters from both agents and publishers which led to the idea of self-publishing as an indie-author.
  • “Indie-authors need to build a massive following over a multitude of social media platforms for their book to even be noticed.” This may be true but I only march to the beat of my own drum and I have little desire to be another dancing monkey.
  • “There is no point in sending out press releases if you are an unknown author.” I sent them anyway.
  • “The mainstream media will ignore indie-authors.” There was evidence to support this belief.  Several major book critics and newspapers do not allow submissions of self-published titles. However . . .

Not being quick to BELIEVE has created my new REALITY.

 

Your Beliefs Create Your Reality: Part 2

Parenting:

Do you ever stop to ponder:

  • why human beings have never put a stop to waging war with one another even after 5000 years?
  • why criminals have always existed?
  • why sexism and racism never go away?

Generation after generation continue to fail to resolve these most basic human issues.

What a parent believes is passed along to their child.

Before a lynch mob of pissed off parental units forms, I will give you an out. You do the best you can with what your society and your influences gave you. Your parents, your role models, and your teachers only prepared you to work within the confines of your society. None of them ever suggested you could do or be more than you are, because they themselves were a product of the same dangerous idea which has kept human growth in check for +/- 166 generations. The idea that change is not worth the effort because it will not last is a primary component of the defeatist mentality which the vast majority of humans share.

This might be by design.

Parents create a Mini Me—a little person who ends up possessing all the same attitudes, behavioral patterns, fears, anxieties, hopes, and dreams as the people who raised them. A parent who believes changing the world is impossible, creates a child who will not make an effort in that direction. A parent who never took the road less traveled will not endorse that road for their child, and unless the child has a rebellious streak in them, the child will not explore beyond what they have been CONDITIONED to be curious about. A parent with an incomplete education will not fully understand the value of a well rounded education so they will not teach their child the value of learning to learn. A religiously indoctrinated parent will allow their children to be indoctrinated to teach them morality, but this just teaches the child to put all hope for mankind in the hands of some deity rather than striving to make a difference in the world themselves.

We endlessly condition children to be just as their fathers and past generations always have been. They follow our example.

Conspiracy theorists will tell you it is all a part of a plan created by the elites to give the average human just enough to keep us from participating in their overthrow. If they were smart enough to continually execute this plan for so many generations, they would also be smart enough to know that the house of cards they have built is about to collapse within the next two generations.

  • Criminals beget criminals.
  • Drug users beget drug users.
  • Welfare families beget welfare families.
  • Laborers beget laborers.
  • Warriors beget warriors.
  • Public servants beget public servants.
  • Academics beget academics.
  • Soulless CEO’s beget soulless CEO’s.

If you as a parent can remain open to ideas other than those you were CONDITIONED to BELIEVE, you have a chance to break the cycle. Show your child only the best parts of you and they will become more than you.

It could be said that by changing your BELIEFS you can change your child’s REALITY.