Bad breakup? Need closure? WTF, try an email.

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How to write the ultimate GO F-CK YOURSELF email to a cowardly ex who denies you closure by going into hiding.

Yeah, I wrote an email like this, and I would do it again if ever I am stupid enough to fall for another selfish narcissistic sociopath who refuses to make a call to end things properly.

Why do this?

It is simple really, you need to get the rage out, and this is infinitely better than burning their stuff in the backyard. The neighbors look at you even more weirdly than normal when you do such things. More importantly, this allows you to process their evil deeds, and the pain you are feeling through carefully chosen words when a long relationship ends horribly. In other words, this is one method of speeding up the recovery process when you have had enough of their bullshit. IT IS ALL ABOUT YOU and your wellbeing. Don’t be polite; they weren’t, and they will not suddenly start appreciating you if you take the high road now. It is time to sink to their level to get through to them. THEY BROUGHT THIS ON THEMSELVES. At times like this, it is not narcissism—it is a survival mechanism.

Essentially, we are aiming to hook them, call them out, and then crush them like the cockroaches they revealed themselves to be.

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To use this article as a template, ideally (and sadly) you would need to have experienced lies, deception, and betrayal which led to you ending a relationship. This is not about revenge. No, this goes deeper. This is about retribution which factors sin into its meaning.

The first line needs to grab their attention, and spark their curiosity so they will continue reading.

Don’t scare them off with a nasty first line; appeal to their humanity in case they have any. Aim to create guilt and remorse whether they are capable of feeling those or not. Go with something like:

Hey, remember me? The person you won’t talk to who. . . 

You then add a reasonable number of important things you did for them—the more life-altering the better.

In the next section, you want to point out why you felt compelled to write to them.

You want to subtly shift from continuing to pile on the guilt to pointing out how their spinelessness forced you to take this action.

I really thought you would step up and talk to me at least one final time. But no, as with every decision you make, you chose poorly once again. You probably will never tell me the whole truth to help me with closure, and even if you did, I would have a hard time believing any of what you might say.

This mild slap in the face will show them how low your opinion of them has become.

Next, remind them how you had noticed their suspicious behavior for some time, and then shift to the possible conclusions you have reached as a result of their lack of communication.

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You can get nasty here. It’s character assassination time. (Woohoo!) You could begin with questions:

Are you on drugs? Are you having a mid-life crisis of epic proportions? Did you fail to take your meds? Are you attempting to sleep your way into money and security rather than working for it? Were you dropped on your head as a baby? etc.

Personally, I prefer statements. You could begin with:

Now that I know the depths of your depravity and duplicity, I think the following are probable:

Your list can be “on the money” or you can take “creative liberties”. You get the idea. Have some fun with it, while making it clear what a loathsome piece of crap you now see them as. Also indicate how you will continue to believe all of these possible truths until such time as they explain their actions.

Add an image of how you now view them for a more dramatic effect.

You could (or perhaps should) go straight to a porn site for an impactful and distasteful image which exemplifies your view of them. Other possibilities might include images of various STDs from a medical book. I went with a less vulgar illustration myself, but it’s your call.

black and white person feeling smiling
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If they have made it this far, it is time to write your heart out.

Admit you weren’t perfect while driving the stakes in. Take a little responsibility while showing how minor your character flaws are when compared with theirs.

I always wanted what is best for you, and it was out of love and caring that. . .

Show how their behavior has left you pitying them. This, of course, presumes you truly know their history or pathology and were not lied to about everything.

It’s sad—so sad—you are incapable of true love and gratitude. I blame. . . 

Don’t be afraid to make unfavorable comparisons with your previous exes or especially people you know they dislike.

My other exes had some class and most knew at least a little of what is appropriate decent behavior. You are a total hypocrite. You slander [Insert name here.] while behaving even worse.

Dive into decency, morality, scruples, ethics. . . whatever you can sink your teeth into which best fits their behavior.

A soft warm up to your closing statements is next.

You could use a bulleted list.

  • I am sad for me for being duped.

If there are children involved, you could add:

  • I am sad for [Child’s name.] because he/she will most likely be raised by the likes of you two.
  • I am sad for your new significant other if you manage to get your claws into their heart, or on the keys to their house and vehicles, or worst of all, access to their bank accounts, insurance policies, and will.
  • And yes, I am sad for you as well, because despite all my efforts to repair the damage done to you, your ability or willingness to retain anything new is abysmal. You will continue on YOUR CHOSEN PATH, unconsciously following your base programming, and this trail will not lead to happiness. On the upside, I have finally figured out my fatal flaw. No one can fix you. Only you can do that, once you trade in self-obsession for self-awareness.

It’s important you leave them to the end of the list so it ties in with the big finish.

Enough of the body blows, it’s time to close with a throat punch because punching the heartless in the chest is pointless.

Here’s an idea for you:

At the end of most of my relationships, I would usually say farewell or good luck in your future. It would be disingenuous of me to say either of these to you because I know Karma is going to tear you a new one over what you have done. YOU ARE SO F-CKED!

I will just say goodbye.

Did it work?

In my case it did. I got most of the poison out. She confirmed the magnitude of her deception and offered up a lame apology. Regardless, it was enough for me to shed any residual affection and desire . . . allowing me to quickly move on to healthier greener pastures.

I can’t wait to see the comments on this post. I expect the miscreants to be outraged, and every person who has dealt with betrayal to love it. We will see.

 

The FEAR Lessons: Part 1

EVIL WORDSMITHS ARE PREYING ON YOUR IMAGINATIONS!

‘FEAR leads to hate; HATE leads to anger; ANGER leads to the dark side.’ – paraphrasing George Lucas from his Star Wars movies.

I will be taking you on a long round-about journey with this blog series, but please stay with it, as there is a fascinating destination.

In this blog, I believe I EVENTUALLY managed to achieve a balanced discussion of some very hotly contested issues facing the West, but you must wade through some passionately written parts to get there.

I struggled with this blog and the potential ramifications of my own words.

I am FEARFUL my words, and the meaning of those words could be twisted by some to incite violence. As with most of what I write, the intent is to create awareness; to make busy often oblivious people stop and think. WHEN YOU WRITE PASSIONATELY, you sometimes cross a line or two (or three as I am known to do). There are professional considerations as well. I write these blogs as part of a publishing platform for a book that I hope to have published. I do not wish to be considered “a cowboy” writer. I also write these blogs as articles to pitch to a media I often have little respect for, but they pay some bills. Perhaps this is why our political leaders appear so wimpy and wishy-washy. Twenty years ago, I would not have given any of this a second thought. Perhaps I am FINALLY growing up. (Don’t bet on it.) It could be all the social conditioning about political correctness and responsible journalism is affecting me. (I doubt it.)

Should we speak from the heart and let the chips fall where they may, or should we temper our words to be less provocative?

As always, the readers can leave their comments on how I did.

For those of you who do not follow twitter, I have recently tweeted many times on the topic of fear. Young people use twitter and I want to reach them with this message.

The most significant to me was this one which summed the game up nicely:

“With greater understanding, there is less fear; ergo WITH TOTAL UNDERSTANDING THERE WOULD BE NO FEAR.”

The cultivation of fear, hate, and anger allow the masses to be more easily manipulated and maneuvered. The problem I have with the growing “global consciousness” is FEAR IS SPREAD FASTER THAN EVER BEFORE.

Canadians are working very hard at leading the world in the adaptation of the “tolerant society” concept. We are not always good at it but we are trying. There are people in this country who will test our resolve to be tolerant. They come in three forms: visitors, citizens, and people in public office. I will later demonstrate for all why testing the RESOLVE of the Canadian people is NOT A WISE MOVE ON YOUR PART.

A recent news event here left me both saddened and concerned.

Not so long ago, an UNARMED Canadian soldier was killed in a place of honor in Ottawa. This is the tragic part of this story. All Canadian’s hearts went out to his family and friends, as did my own.

The CANADIAN good for nothing f-cking piece of shit who did this was killed. I hope he died slowly and in severe pain after being shot in our Parliament building a short time after murdering our soldier.

YOU SEE, WE CANADIANS ARE NOT ALWAYS SO POLITE.

In fact we can be nasty when PUSHED and history proves this. We have the respect of much of the world as peace makers, but there is another side to us which needs to be understood and remembered by the readers who are not Canadian, and those whose educational systems did not tell them about us.

HOW TO DEFINE A CANADIAN:

The world has trouble with this. Our politicians have trouble with this. New Canadians have trouble with this. Our mainstream media has trouble with this.

We are a small country in terms of population. We are hugely OUTNUMBERED ten-fold by our neighboring countries like the U.S.A. and Russia. A country that does not understand a Canadian may think we are just pawns in the Soviet / U.S. chess match. They would be grossly mistaken. We have the respect of both of these peoples, and we are neighborly to both, but we back down from neither. In fact the Russian people and Canadians share a similar knowledge of hardship and resolve, and this is what created our common thread.

To your average Canadian, global politics is just not that important to us. We have more important things to attend to like working hard to feed our families. We are not isolationists, we invite everyone to come and stay, if they can handle it. We have a simple global outlook: if you do not bother us; WE WILL NOT BOTHER YOU.

As part of the British Commonwealth, we have a little bit of their “stiff upper lip” mentality coupled with a RESOLVE stemming from our fierce living and working conditions. We can relate well with the Irish, Scottish, and Welsh because they have tougher living conditions than English people. Most Canadians would happily trade our snowy winters for the rain and fog of England. You see, we do not have a sun-belt as our Southern neighbors do. We do not have a California, Florida, or Arizona but we like going to those places for a break.

It is tough where we live and it makes us tough: mentally, physically and emotionally.

We should never dominate any sport because of our limited funding and small population, BUT WE DO. This comes from a stubborn RESOLVE once we set out mind on an OBJECTIVE. It should also be noted we have a NATIONAL PRIDE that is best seen through our national pastime: hockey. It is a tough game for tough men. Our style of hockey is being watered down to accommodate growing interest in the game outside of Canada, but we are always a team NEVER TO BE UNDERESTIMATED. This Canadian national pride and stubborn resolve comes from HARDSHIP. We are survivors. We have a rich heritage of succeeding where others fear to tread.

The Swedes, thought to be the most physically fit lumberjacks in the world, were brought to Canada by large lumber companies to teach our Canadian boys a thing or two about hard work in the B.C. forests. It did not work out too well for them. They had trouble with the altitudes and insects, and took home a new found respect for those Crazy Canucks.

Our crime rate here is quite low, outside of drug and alcohol related incidents. Our sober assaults on each other are very infrequent compared to most countries. We turn the other cheek until we reach a breaking point and are FORCED INTO A CONFLICT. The reason is simple, once a Canadian is in this headspace, we are dangerous.

In World War One where my grandfather participated in trench warfare, 100,000 French soldiers were killed or wounded at Vimy Ridge. The Canadians were brought in after training specifically for the task of taking this important German-held position. The Canadian soldiers showed such incredible RESOLVE and feats of bravery in accomplishing their mission, that the French government gave that little piece of France to Canada forever. It seems these soldiers kept on ADVANCING when their officers were killed, and perhaps most bizarrely of all, when they ran out of bullets. Yes, there are true stories of Canadian soldiers charging machine-gun positions with bayonets.

There is another WW1 story that you should know: Flanders and the town of Passchendaele.

Imagine walking on a rain soaked muddy narrow dock with only one board every 16 inches carrying a 24 kilogram (or 53 pound) anchor, while machinegun bullets flew over your head and artillery shells fell all around, in the rain, with your clothes soaked with mud. If you slipped off the little dock, you would probably drown, not in water, but mud, and your pals were ORDERED not to help you. This was the reality of Allied soldiers who were there. Over 300,000 British, Australian and New Zealand casualties were recorded before the Canadians Corps would be called in. After 14 days of continuous battle, Canadians did what some thought was impossible, and paved the way for the allies to make a run into Belgium. Try to picture one million water-filled muddy shell holes in a one square mile area. Only the surface of the moon comes to my mind, but this was even more concentrated. 15,654 Canadian casualties were the cost of this victory. 1000 are still there in Flanders fields. A relatively small number when compared to the Allied losses, but a lot for a country with a small population of just under 8,000,000 at the time.

Other lesser known places that you should  be aware of are: Gravenstafel Ridge: 6064 casualties, Amiens: 9,074 casualties, and Canal Du Nord and Cambrai: 13,672 casualties. They were all success stories; Canadian victories; with a cost Canadians were willing to pay for IN THE NAME OF FREEDOM.

619,000 young men enlisted in the Canadian Expeditionary Force in WW1. 233,000 were casualties, or almost 37%, and almost 10% died in service to the British Throne and this country. No town or village across the entire country was unaffected by the losses.

Just 25 years later we would be at it again.

Within a month of Britain’s declaration of war with Germany in WW2, the Canadian Army would grow from 5,000 to 70,000 people; not men. We have a proud tradition of Servicewomen in this country going back more than 100 years.

Both of my parents served: my mother in the Royal Canadian Air Force, and my father in the Canadian Army Corps.

My mom outranked my dad and never let him forget it.

In World War Two, we Canadians again were the ones who did “the impossible”. A mountaintop fortress named Assoro in Italy had to be taken in order for allied troops to advance. Canadian soldiers climbed a 900 meter (or nearly 3000 foot) mountain to take this objective which would allow Canadians to have a high-ground position that led to a German retreat from the area.

My father landed on Juno Beach . . . one of the most heavily defended beaches of the five in the invasion of Normandy. “Stiff resistance” was overcome, and the Canadians were the ONLY unit of the five to achieve their Normandy landing objectives. Bad weather left those Canadian soldiers ADVANCING inland without tanks against the German’s 21rst Panzer Division. We ADVANCED anyhow.

Allied commanders would recognize the value of the Canadian Army, and would employ them as “SHOCK-TROOPS” in tough places throughout the war.

At Breskens Pocket, Canadians would again fight in mud . . . and win. In order to take the port of Antwerp, Canadians launched a frontal assault across the heavily defended Leopold Canal and got the job done.

An all too short time later In Korea, a Brigade of Canadians and Australians fought a delaying action with desperate defensive battles in a place called Kap Yong, while surrounded by an entire division of the Chinese army trying to take the city of Seoul. They stalled the advance, and won a U.S. Presidential Unit Citation; rarely given to non-U.S. forces.

So what was the point of this little foray into Canadian history?

IT IS TIME THAT A MESSAGE WAS SENT TO EVERY COUNTRY ON THE PLANET.

We are Canadians. We try to avoid a fight for as long as we can. We do not run from a fight. We are very good at fighting. We do not scare easily. We do not concern ourselves with THREAT LEVELS or PARANOID WATCH LISTS. If you show up here with bad intentions, we will beat you in the streets with hockey sticks if we have to. WE WILL ADVANCE ON YOUR POSITIONS AND YOU WILL LOSE.

While a Canadian will be the last person to start a conflict . . . we are best known for FINISHING THEM.

We are always OUTNUMBERED. We are used to that. In WW2 our kill ratio was 1:25 or one of ours for twenty-five of theirs. Additionally our capture ratio was 1:235 or one of ours to 235 of theirs.

Do not provoke us to test our RESOLVE.

You have NO IDEA who you are messing with. Do not judge us by our politicians and media; those are poor examples of real Canadians. Do not become an OBJECTIVE. We quickly and efficiently dispatch obstacles. Do not light a fuse that ignites our NATIONAL PRIDE as it will not end well for you.

A Canadian should NEVER BE UNDERESTIMATED.

We deal with HARDSHIP every day. A Canadian FORCED INTO CONFLICT is not the nice friendly person projected by our media. ADVANCING is in our nature. Retreating is not. The few times we have were usually a delaying tactic because we were outnumbered, and WE ALWAYS CAME BACK AND WON.

Canadians have paid a high price for FREEDOM. There is nothing we value more. ANYONE who messes with our freedom, whether foreign or DOMESTIC, is in for a nightmare. This includes our politicians. They should NEVER consider themselves impervious to the wrath of angry Canadians who are aware of the daily erosion of FREEDOM in this country. To understand the term SHOCK-TROOPS, think of it this way: If you think you are safe . . . THINK AGAIN.

Do yourself a favor and pick on someone you have a chance to actually terrorize. IT IS NOT US.

Now, let us circle back to the beginning where I said I was “both saddened and concerned.” My concern over this tragedy is what happened politically, and in the media, in the wake of the news item.

  • It was confirmed this was an attack by a single individual BORN IN CANADA. A “home-grown terrorist” on October 22, 2014.
  • We were told he had drug and mental issues from a reliable source: his mother.
  • We were told he had a long criminal record.
  • We were told he had converted to Islam in 2004.
  • We were told he had links to jihadists.
  • We were told he was KICKED OUT of a Sunni mosque in Vancouver.
  • We were told he was living in a homeless shelter in Ottawa.
  • We were told he was helped by two other men who wore suits.
  • We were told he was back on drugs three days before the attack.
  • His body was released (quietly) to be buried in Libya by his family.
  • It has been suggested, although not proved,  he received a blessing prior to this act of cowardice.

The President of the United States of America called (presumably) to express condolences and offer any assistance we might need. This made me scratch my head. Does our Prime Minister make such calls every time there is a school shooting by some drugged out mental loser in the States? I think not. Lots of innocents die down there on a regular basis.

SO, WHY DID THIS STORY GARNER INTERNATIONAL ATTENTION?

One innocent man died and one asshole got what he deserved. Yes, there was uncommon bravery involved in bringing the gunman down. We are Canadians. WE EXPECT NOTHING LESS FROM OUR PEOPLE.

Was this asshole another Lee Harvey Oswald—a drugged patsy?

THERE WAS ANOTHER MORE RECENT PARALLEL EMERGING.

During the last Bush administration, South of the border, executive powers were granted after 9/11 IN THE NAME OF SECURITY to fight the war on terror, which led to us becoming aware of FEMA. The Federal Emergency Management Agency has been managed since by the then new U.S. Department of Homeland Security; both of which have EXTRAORDINARY POWER any time an imminent terrorist threat is declared; which is ALL THE TIME NOW.

Has our federal government used the event in Ottawa to help convince Canadians we are vulnerable to terrorism?

ABSOLUTELY.

Has our federal government used the event in Ottawa to help convince Canadians that bombing ISIS was the right thing to do?

ABSOLUTELY.

Opinion polls AFTER THE OTTAWA EVENT suggest 66% of Canadians are now in favor of a continued and prolonged effort.

THE THEN “UNPOPULAR” LEGISLATION WAS PASSED JUST 15 DAYS BEFORE THE OTTAWA INCIDENT.

Our defense minister said “ISIL constitutes a CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER to Canada and our allies.” The Harper government’s decision was not popular with Parliamentarians, nor was it popular with the Canadian public when it was first introduced. The “clear and present danger” cliché from a Hollywood movie, was a nice added touch though; it RESONATED in the Canadian psyche.

Anyone else feeling manipulated?

Has our federal government used the Ottawa event to launch its new SECURITY BILL just 5 days after the Ottawa incident?

ABSOLUTELY.

Has our federal government used the Ottawa event to attempt to give CSIS and law enforcement even more power to ABUSE in the name of SECURITY?

ABSOLUTELY.

Conspiracy theorists have even gone one step BEYOND WHAT I WANT TO BELIEVE, suggesting a soldiers life was sacrificed to accomplish the goals of the Harper government, and whoever is pulling his strings.

Let us get something straight here people; this was a tragic shooting incident, NOT A NUCLEAR DETONATION. Our response does not fit the crime nor the threat.

We are being sold FEAR and being asked to give up FREEDOM for SECURITY.

It is not a good trade.

To whoever is pulling the strings of North American politicians I say this:

Stick your THREAT LEVELS and WATCH LISTS where the sun never shines because they are not welcome here in Canada.

Spreading FEAR and PARANOIA will not work here like it has elsewhere because we Canadians DO NOT SCARE THAT EASILY. Until I see ISIS on the streets of a Canadian city, I will not be AFRAID. If it happens, I will get ANGRY and this broken-down old Canadian will lead a charge with a bayonet into a machine-gun emplacement, and WE WILL TAKE IT from the f-ckers. This is the Canadian way of solving problems.

When G. W. came looking for help with his war on terror, we passed. We had good sense then so WHAT HAS CHANGED? Leadership comes to mind.

My Grandfather FOUGHT for the freedom we are being asked to give up.

Both my parents FOUGHT for the freedom we are being asked to give up.

I am too old and broken to fight this with anything other than words, but I AM A CANADIAN and we do not like to be PUSHED! We will not tolerate being PUSHED by people outside this country nor will we tolerate being PUSHED by elected officials inside the country.

IT APPEARS POSSIBLE OUR FREEDOM IS BEING ATTACKED BY HOME-GROWN TERRORISTS WE CALL OUR GOVERNMENT LEADERS AND THEIR MEDIA.

Blogus-interuptus.

To be continued.